Bleo'’s Nasty Stuff

For that matter so is cancer.

Ok, now that I’'ve said that I feel a bit better. But only a little. Needs more expletives. I'll let you do a Mad Libs type of exercise and fill in your own. Here goes:

Bleo is _______ , ________, ________ .

adjective, adjective, noun.

Cancer sucks.

Oh wait, I was supposed to let YOU fill in the blanks...

Cancer ______________________ sucks.
any kind of words you want!

Anyway. Frank found some fun cancer web sites last night. Yes I did say fun. Planet Cancer is just one. It's got some funny stuff, it's geared to the youngsters (as in young adults, not kids).

OK. Today is round one day 16. Frank got the final chemo of this round yesterday: the push of Bleo.

He'’s been feeling so good that aside from the extreme tiredness and his hair beginning to fall out everything seems fairly normal. If you read that last statement twice, 1^st straight up and then next w/ sarcasm, you have a good idea of how I'’m doing, because I do mean it both ways. Everything seems normal, but it’'s not. It i’s such a bipolar existence right now.

Last night Frank had a reaction to yesterday'’s chemo and I got to make my first call to the on-call Doctor.

He’'d gone to bed early with chills (a common reaction to Bleo), all wrapped up in flannel pjs, a hat and socks, then covered w/ a thermal blanket and 2 home made quilts. I would have been hot too! At 10pm he asked me to check his temp and then to call the Dr.

The Dr. was very nice and helpful. Frank's blood counts have now fallen below normal, but are still in a very good range. I was instructed to medicate the 102.5 temperature with Tylenol and if it didn’t go down below 100.5 within the hour I was to take him to the ER. If the counts had been lower I would have had to take him in.

Once we unwrapped him and medicated him the temp fell. Thank goodness!

Neither one of us was looking forward to traveling in the freezing drizzle that was last night. I was afraid of falling just on our front porch! And most of you know I’m really good at falling down. (and YES I am being careful!, there is a bag of ice melt next to the front door that I am using after I notice the dog slipping and sliding when he’'s sent out. :-P I'm now sticking my tongue out at you.) We are to get snow and sleet here today. Goodie.

Frank'’s scheduled to get the head shaved this morning. I may encourage him to rest today and wait until tomorrow. He’'s (we'’re both) pretty wigged out (no pun intended) about his hair falling out all over the place. But it’'s not really that bad yet, it can wait a day or two. I have to admit, while he'’s still had his beautiful mop of hair there has been some denial, on my part at least, that all this is really happening. I wouldn'’t mind if he waited a day or two. I do however love seeing his face. **gush** He'’s so darn cute. Not to mention that shaving his goatee & mustache took 15 years off his face. Pictures to come.

I'’m looking for the silver lining. The gray skies to have a certain beauty to them; see the picture I took a few days ago the trees w/out leaves. There is beauty in the barrenness of wintertime, perhaps because I have always paid close attention to the turning of the seasons and I have the hope that spring will come.

Wednesday (tomorrow) is Ash Wednesday in the Christian calendar. Easter will come early this year. If all goes well, round three of chemo ends with Easter Sunday. It will be a day of great rejoicing, celebrating all kinds of resurrections!