Tonight marks the 1st anniversary of Frank telling me that “something” was not quite right with all his bits and pieces. For about a week he’d been experiencing discomfort and finally invited me into the situation by telling me about it.
Could it be that he’d gained weight and his underwear was just binding him?
Could it be that he’d pulled a muscle whilst trying to tone up by doing sit ups? (I don’t he’s done any since then…heh heh heh. Anyway.)
Could it be that he had testicular cancer?
Naw, it was probably just and infection of the epididymitis (an infection of the testis, or worst case (ALERT: the following will make you squeamish) a twisted teste—it does happen.
But that wouldn’t explain why one was hard and the other wasn’t.
It was Friday night, the church choir had a Christmas concert and he’d waited to tell me until after 5pm. I had half a mind to make him go to the emergency room. He didn’t want to go and in retrospect they would have told him what we decided to do anyway: Frank would make a call to an Urologist 1st thing Monday morning.
I sat by myself at the concert watching him sing with my imagination running wild. He’d not felt “good” for several weeks. His back had been bothering him, he looked tired. He has cancer! He can’t have cancer! Why would HE get cancer? It’s just an infection…..
That was December 17, 2004. The following week he wore bib overalls—“Bibbies”—every day in an effort to lessen the pain and be comfortable. He’s never been one to dress up for work, but even I thought he was pushing the fashion limits of his office. His appointment wasn’t until December 27, a full week away. We tried different kinds of underwear—maybe that was causing his pain? And he did TONS of internet research, sharing only some of it with me—why freak me out when I had one of the busiest weeks of the church year going on?
And now we come full circle, the choir has their Christmas program tonight.
What a year.
I’m glad it’s over and yet, I learned so much.
Some I didn’t want to: being an expert in testicular cancer is not always the most useful of party tricks for a female clergy person.
But, most of all my love, admiration and appreciation for my amazing husband grew deeper and stronger. I don’t know if I needed cancer to help me do that, but I’m trying to find the lemonade made from the lemons of the last year! Now I’m going to dry the tears that are inexplicably dripping from my cheeks!
Have a Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!
The Rev
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2 comments:
Since I didn't know you guys a year ago, I just went back to read the first few months' worth of posts. All I can say right now is thank you for doing this. It is reminding me how precious God's gift of life truly is.
Andy B.
Happy Bibby Anniversary. You have much to celebrate in faith and life. Thank you for sharing it with the rest of us, and reminding me of home. You serve an awesome church, in case you didn't know.
Marcy
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